None The Wiser
Hello, I hope you’re well. I’m writing to you regarding your slogan “King of Beers” and the comments that follow come from both a concerned beer drinker and a proud American citizen. It is something that has been both troubling and weighing on me for quite some time, so please bear with me if I get too passionate.
On July 4th, 1776 the United States of America proudly declared it’s independence from England. In doing so, we rejected the monarchal government adopting a democratic one thus making the idea of a king null and obsolete. Have you forgotten the lives lost during the may wars that took place on our road to freedom? When you scantily wrap your ice cold cans of lager with the American flag, does its meaning slip your mind? It worries me that you are too concerned about making beer and not at all concerned with fixing your well-known slogan. If you want to highlight America and its damn fine political system, it seems appropriate to change your ostentatious catchwords. An alternate option could quite simply be “President of Beers”.
Is it even possible to be king of something you produce? That strikes me as a bit odd. Take for example Burger King. Their stock has been steadily declining for the past ten years. Yet, they continue to claim to be the king of burgers. On the other hand looking at the career of Genghis Khan we can clearly see that possessing a great deal of something does give you power over others. But is that truly the legacy you want to leave to future generations? A monopolizing hoarder that will eventually sink in its own wealth before it takes the time to learn to swim?
I digress. During the research phase of this letter, I discovered you do indeed sell the most beer. More than any other company on this planet. In doing so, I suppose that gives you the right to call yourself the “whatever you want” of beers. Heck, you could call yourself the sultan of beer and I don’t think anyone would blink an eye.
I know this must be a lot to take in, so take a weekend or two to mull it over and don’t hesitate to write back with any questions or comments.
Derek S. Moore